I have spent most of my time this week packing up my mother’s studio because my father is moving out of our family home. This was my mom’s special room and was always the place that paid homage to her creative soul. While sifting through the objects left behind, I found some amazingly beautiful things – her belongings which have brought back incredible memories.
Hidden behind a pile of brightly coloured fabrics, I found a collection of nearly finished hand sewn dolls, each with its own identity and personality. You can just tell that my mom had thought about each and every detail.
One of the dolls was left with a needle inside it and a purple thread hanging from it, where she must have left it, planning to return at a later stage. Another had a pink striped ribbon, folded in a bow, with a pearl-tip-pin holding it in place, waiting to be sewn. Her creativity felt so tangible in those moments as I held the dolls and remembered my mom. It was as if I was delving into her world once again and she was sat right next to me telling me what she would be making next.
There were platted ribbons from which she was making necklaces and crocheted rings that she used for making bracelets.
The week was so much harder than I had ever imagined: I cried and chuckled to myself, knowing what she must have been thinking while she was making these treasures and as I boxed them all up I felt so empty, knowing that her prized possessions were sitting in six brown soulless cardboard boxes in the hallway, waiting to be moved to another home.
But another voice also lauded over me. Having spent the week close to all my mom’s things I could clearly hear her strong South African voice saying: ‘Now pull yourself together. If you want to be miserable…go be miserable on your own.’
So I picked myself up, grabbed a big handful of the celebration chocolates that sit in the massive purple glass bowl in the TV room and ate every single one on my way home. They only lasted until the first traffic light but they did the trick.
Now…dreading my weight watchers weigh in.